It’s February and I’m standing in a long check-out line in the supermarket vowing that from now on I will buy only 12 items or less. However, the wait does give me the opportunity to peruse the display of women’s magazines, each reminding me that it will soon be Valentine’s Day.
While I can no longer relate to the luscious young things that appear on the covers, or to their sexy red dresses with necklines that plunge to the waist, (how do they keep everything in place?) my thoughts turn to the upcoming day
Having been married for several decades, I wonder if this occasion
has the same meaning it had when love was new, and he had the local
florist on speed dial? Is there a Hallmark card, box of chocolates and a
candlelight dinner in my future? Or is it meatloaf and the Golf Channel?
As years go by, it’s easy to take each other for granted. I can’t help
but wonder if it is still love, or comfortable familiarity, like a pair of
old shoes, that keeps the marriage engine running.
So I penned this quiz to help determine if the sparks are real, or merely static electricity. Go ahead and try it; it’s like a Cosmo quiz for the AARP set.
He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not
1. He lowers the toilet seat. (Even sometimes counts.)
2. He releases the remote control before falling asleep in front of the TV.
3. He talks to me more than he talks to Siri.
4. He agrees to try snore strips.
5. He says yes to dinner with my old school friend and her boring husband without rolling his eyes.
6. He inserts his hearing aids when I tell him there’s something we need to discuss.
7. He grabs my hand even when he’s not about to trip over a curb.
8. When ordering Chinese food for two, he gives me first pick of the fortune cookies.
9. He gets rid of his old newspapers after only three requests.
10. Everything he can’t find is not my fault.
While we didn’t fare so well on #2, the overall score reassured me that we have stood the test of time. On the morning of February 14th I can look forward to him reaching for me before he reaches for his iPad. And at night, meatloaf on the couch sounds delightful. Golf? I’m not so sure.
Susan Goldfein holds a doctorate in Communication Disorders from Teachers
College, Columbia University, and enjoyed a successful career as a clinician,
teacher, and consultant. For more essays filled with wit, wisdom and irony,
visit Susan’s blog, www.susansunfilteredwit.com. Her book, “How Old Am I in
Dog Years?” may be purchased on Amazon.com and BarnesandNoble.com