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A Slice of Advice with Ms. Price
Dear Ms. Price,
My son is in his mid-thirties and much to my dismay, he drives a motorcycle. This absolutely terrifies me because of the accident rate and statistics. To make matters worse, I just found out that he is now riding without a helmet. I am worried sick and am at the point where I am having anxiety attacks and can’t sleep. How can I get him to listen to me and stop riding the motorcycle?
Worried Sick in Dunedin
I can’t say that I blame you. It is a valid concern and one made worse by the fact that he refuses to wear a helmet.
You didn’t mention the status of your relationship with your son. If you have a positive relationship and he cares about you, my advice is to schedule a nice relaxed dinner, a special time for just the two of you to spend time together and talk. Voice your concerns to your son, share the statistics and see if there is any way to compromise. Perhaps he may be willing to at least wear a helmet or take a class in motorcycle safety. Let him know you respect his right to make his own choices but you have valid concerns.
Like you said, he is in his thirties and he is an adult. Riding a motorcycle with the safety rules and regulations in mind can be safe. Hopefully, he will compromise, wear a helmet and the two of you can find a way to work this out in a safe way.
Dear Ms. Price,
I have been separated for two years and am close to getting a divorce from my second husband. We’re finally at a place where things are amicable. However, I am finding that he has lied to a lot of people in my life about the facts behind our divorce, placing the blame on me. He has even lied to my children and parents about our situation, accusing me of things I didn’t do.
I always tried to keep our marital life private, but because I have been respectful and have kept things private it has come to bite me in the butt.
How should I handle this? When I start to discuss the facts, I am met with skepticism and judgement from my parents and children. I feel like I’m in a lose-lose situation.
Stabbed in the Back
I’m glad to hear that things are amicable, but it seems to me that your ex has some cleanup to do. He made the mess and he needs to clean it up. Schedule a meeting and sit down all concerned and have your ex explain what he did. If he won’t do this, then you sit down and explain the truth to your loved ones. Just state your truth with as little emotion as possible and then move on. Make it clear that you will not allow people to lie about you any longer and that you will shine a light whenever you hear untruths said about you.